Blabber

I finished the pill last night, so its getting closer. I have only suffered one headache from the syranal spray so far but I have to admit I have never felt so tierd in the afternoons since I was pregnant and its really effecting my emotions, but I guess thats what you expect when you get pumped full of hormones. I'm tipping the hormones are struggling to deal with it too, I can just picture them all running around with tissues on one hand wiping away their tears lol.

I have so many mixed feeling flying around right now, its like I want to get to transfer but I don't cause what happens if it fails and knowing I always respond better to fresh cycles better than frozen I just wanna by pass the FET's and stop wasting money. Oh here I go again wiping out the cycle before I get to it, guess it comes naturally after 7 transfers and a loss of my 16 week Angel.

Thought I might post this, so if your good with emailing and expressing your discust this might be a good one:

John James to ban IVFDanielle CroninThursday, 28 September 2006Fertility and other reproductive health treatments have been banned at theACT's largest private hospital by the new Catholic Church owners.John James Memorial Hospital is expected to announce today that the LittleCompany of Mary, which operates Calvary Hospital, will take over the runningof the Deakin facility. Both parties would not comment on the deal yesterdayJohn James management has told Canberra Fertility Centre and Sydney IVFCanberra the only clinics of their kind in the ACT that the hospital'soperating theatres will be off-limits to women undergoing a crucial part offertility treatment in a change that has been blasted by IVF and healthspecialists.They have been told procedures to retrieve women's eggs can no longer beperformed at the hospital from October 6. About 400 women every year undergothis procedure in the ACT every year.The Little Company of Mary is opposed to IVF, abortions and sterilisation ofmen and women because of its religious beliefs.John James Memorial's board has been considering bids to buy the businessafter it was publicly revealed in June that the hospital was in financialstrife.Little Company of Mary will own two of the three private hospitals orcontrol 75 per cent of the private hospital beds in the ACT if the sale goesahead.The Australian Competition and Consumer Commission has conducted an informalreview and concluded the sale "would be unlikely to result in a substantiallessening of competition". But it is understood that several doctors havesince complained to the consumer watchdog about the restrictions on servicesif Little Company of Mary takes over.Canberra Fertility Centre scientific director Chris Copeland said yesterdaythat the organisation had been at John James for 20 years but received twoweeks' notice of the "bizarre and absurd" change.The clinic's specialists performed about 230 egg retrieval procedures everyyear on about 170 women undergoing IVF.The change would affect women already on the fertility program, potentiallydrive up the cost of treatment and cause anxiety."I cannot for my life of me understand why the new owners of the hospitalcould not have turned around to us and said, 'Well look, this is ourattitude and we'll give you until the new year to find alternativearrangements'," Dr Copeland said. "I could have lived with that, that wouldhave been the way to do it. But this business of you're out in two weeks isjust crap, it really is crap."Dr Copeland said they had been "running around like headless chooks" to finda short-term solution.National Capital Private Hospital did not have theatre space but Caps Clinica plastic surgery centre in Deakin had made available a procedure room forboth Canberra Fertility Centre and Sydney IVF Canberra.

So sad what our world is coming too!!

October 2005

October 24, 2005

Tuesday 20th April 2004

Bit tender and tierd, I wasn't as nervous as what I thought except sitting waiting to be called in.

When we arrived we had to pay for the bed, Nath had to go to another room to do his bit for the creation of our embies while I sat and waited for my name to be called. It was called and we had to check name, date of birth etc then led into another room with other couples to wait. My name was called and we had to go get changed, I went into one room and Nath into another.
The anaesthiologist and my Dr came in to see how things were and to be recommended that I be fully put under because of the amount of follies and how uncomfy it will be. We waited a bit longer and then my name was called.

We went in, I had to get on the table and Nath was right by my side. All as I remember is a needle going into my right arm, the blood preasure cuff going onto my left, myDr saying he was going to scrub up and that was it.

Woke up, went in and out of sleep for a while. They gave me some drugs for the pain then moved me a couple of beds down and I saw hubby come walking up to me. He told me they the retrived 9 eggs out of 19 follies, was a little disappaointed as I thought there would of been more.

Back in time

This next part will be back near my first cycle in April 2004.

Wed 14th April:
We went for our ultra sound today, was so scard that there wasn't going to be any follicles but to our surprise we have 20+, no wonder I am so bloated. After the scan we had to go to another room to see a nurse who would explain the next step for us as in the trigger injection to make you ovulate and how if you have over 20 follicles you can Hyperstimulate. This means OHSS occurs when the ovaries respond to stimulation by producing too many follicles and eggs. When this occurs then the ovaries enlarge to several times their usual size and fluid from the blood stream leaks into the abdominal cavity causing it to swell noticeably. This leaves the blood more concentrated and viscous and prone to spontaneous small or large blood clots. In a Mild cases of OHSS may pass unnoticed, cause only a sensation of bloating, sudden weight gain as the result of the fluid retention or mild lower abdominal pain. Vomiting is a worrying symptom especially when there is also a reduction in urine output. This will be manifest by the passage of small or infrequent amounts of concentrated urine. In more serious instances there may be an accumulation of fluid in the spaces around the lungs and shortness of breath.
The consequences of severe OHSS (which is very rare) include kidney and liver failure and blood clots (thrombosis) in major arteries or veins. Unrecognised or inappropriately treated OHSS can be life threatening.

Sunday 19th April:
Had my trigger injection tonight, I had to use a packet of frozen pea's to numb the tummy as I heard it stings lol. All went fine with my husband laughing at me.

Monday 19th April:
Am nervous about egg pickup tomorrow at 8 am, I hope theres lots of eggs and not just empty follies.....Oh and not alot of pain lol.

Walking into that specialist room was one of the most daunting things I had done in a while, whilst excited about getting started the negativity of it all started to come across when he started reading out the low figure rate of pregnancy rates within IVF. Being told that the average for falling pregnant is about 4 times, this miscarriage rate is high especially with pcos and of course the price!
We were give a pathology script for both of us to have HIV and Hep blood tests done and all pending ok we could start asap and as this was late December of 03 we had to wait till Feb to start as the clinics all closed for christmas and January.

I was to go on the pill for 21 days, have a period, start sniffing synaral a nasal spray, which taste like crap. Go for a ultra sound to make sure the lining of my uterus wasn't to thin or thick, then 2 days later I started injections (150iu) for 8 days. I was so scared I hate needles at the best of times but me being me had to get Nath to do it for me!! They were done through the tummy and without me looking lol. They wern't to bad to start off with but towards the end I was over them.
I had to go for an ultra sound on day 8 to check to see if my folicles on my ovaries were growing to the right size and as expected no they were still alittle small, so another 4 days of injections.....YIPPY!!!!!! Back I go for an ultra sound and I was given the ok to go for egg pickup in two days. I had to wait for a phone call from the hospital to tell me when to have my trigger injection, this is an injection to make you ovulate, I waited and waited but still no phone call I honestly thought they had forgot about me and as usual I worked myself up for nothing as the phone call soon came. Trigger was set for 8.30pm Sunday night.
Hearing that the trigger shot was a stinger I woosed out and had to put a packet of frozen pea's on my tummy to numb it lol, I'm such a sook with this stuff.

Egg pickup was booked for Tues 20th April at 8am at Melbourne IVF and I'm crapping myself of the unknown!!!!

October 23, 2005

The Next Step

After we had been sent to a gyno to help with the pcos and trying to get pregnant it was still not happening. I had been through 8 Clomid cycles with still nothing at the end of each of them, 8 months of tears and heart ache. My Dr decided to do a Laparoscopy (exploratory surgery), which I was told was about a 45 minute procedure and I could go home later that day. I remember a Dr coming into me to explain everything and to give me the complications of could happen and I remember him saying to me 'there is a risk that the bowl could be knicked, but its only like a one in 5000 chance'!!!! I was woken up only to be told that there had been a complication and I was about to be transported to another hospital.When I woke up the next day I was informed that my bowl had been knicked!! The 45 minute procedure had turned into 3 plus hrs with my husband having no idea as to what was going on, when he asked he was told that there had been a complication and that's all they could say. With time passing on he was becoming more worried, so he went out to the car to ring my mother to tell her she better come down. As he was walking in a nurse met him and asked him to meet the Dr in the chapel and of course as you could imagine he was as worried as anything by now.......and he was told what had happened.

I was in hospital for a week and off work for a month with a cut from my belly button to my pubic area and ended up taking me 2 months to get over it. We had our appointment with my gyno to tell me one of the most devastating things of my life.........When my appendix had burst when I was 16 (misdiagnosed by a so called Dr), the scar tissue had grown all through my reproductive system and crushed my tubes tight. He said it was a mess in there and in later life I would have to have an operation to remove it all. The next thing that came out of his mouth I was not prepared for.... I will never conceive naturally!!!! Our only option now is IVF and I was referred to a specialist.

Septemeber 2005

September 16, 2005

This Blog is dedicated to mine and my husbands journey to having Children. We have been trying to conceive (ttc) for nearly 4 years with no success.

Well where do you start, your born to believe that one day you'll grow up to have a family of your own, to be happy, live life to the fullist. You meet the man of your dreams, you deside its time to start a family, 6months pass, 12 months pass and still nothing. You take that trip to the Doctors told to be patient, you mention that you've heard of a infertility problem called PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and that you feel you have alot of the symptoms, but only to be told "naa you wouldn't have that" but we can do a blood test to see if there is something else and we'll test for that too.
A few days later you return for your test results to be told that we think you have PCOS and we'll have to send you for an ultrasound. Another few days pass and you get your ultrasound done, a week later your back at the doctors for it to be confirmed that yes you do have PCOS and your on your way to a specialist. Now your journey begins..................

September 09, 2005

Well I'm going to give this ago, not sure how it works or if I will last, but hey can't hurt. 

One of my Fav pics 

Our Bodies & Drugs

Yesterday was day one of Syranal, gotta love the sniffing twice a day and yep got the headache that goes with it!! Day 2 and so far so good. Its amazing how we put our bodies through all this crap, pumping chemicals through and through and it just responds (well I guess I am one of the lucky ones that it does). I often wonder what our insides are saying when the first injection or first spray is done not to mention the fat gene's that seems to think party time and add a few more kilo's to the scales. Then we put ourselves through daily injections, our ovaries being force feed juice to make it work overtime being pushed to the limit and you can almost hear them breathe a sigh of relief when its all over, almost like smoke coming out of a over heated engine.

We haven't told our families yet that we are cycling again and not sure when or if we will. Its just so hard sometimes telling them as you don't really get alot of reaction out of them. My mum's is "oh ok" and is just like please don't get too excited about the whole thing. I know dad is happy for us but he sort of keeps things to himself and was hit hard when we lost Chloe.

I had 2 weeks holidays and was on the weight loss thingy, managed to lose 1.5kg but now I'm back at work I'm eating like a friggin pig again. I just don't know how to stop lol and I so wanted to lose weight before my next cycle but as usual I just can't follow through.

For those that don't know how to post on my Blog cause of the change you can do it through Other or Anon. I am trying to get this sorted out and move homes but am having a bit of trouble moving this blog to the new one.

Need a new home

I am think of changing Blogger homes so if anyone can recommend a place and give me the instructions on how to transfer it all across I would be very much greatful.

I love my Blogging and miss it so much, I can still post but I can't hear back from you all. They have really stuffed this up!!

Ok as fo me I am half way through my pill, very moody, teary and thats just me getting up for my first day at work after finishing 2 weeks holidays lol.

Blogger Problems

I don't know whats going on but a couple of you have contacted me regarding not being able to post or ead my blog. Well thanks to Blogger Beta version you too can have these problems and you know what you can't change back & there's no one to help you either!!
I miss you all!!

Things About Me

Things About Me

Place an X by all the things you've done or remove the X from the ones youhave not, and send it to all of your friends (including me). This is for your entire life:-

(x) Smoked a cigarette.

(x) Drank so much you threw up in a parking lot ... Mmmm does the drive way count?? hehehe

( ) Crashed a friend's car.

( ) Stolen a friend's car.

(x) Been in love.

(x) Been dumped.

( ) Been laid off/fired...

(x) Quit your job

(x) Been in a fist fight - With my sister

( ) Snuck out of your parent's house .. hell yes... who hasn't

(x) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back

( ) Been arrested?

( ) Gone on a blind date.

(x) Lied to a friend - Would be lying if you said no

(x) Skipped school

( ) Seen someone die

( ) Been to Canada.

( ) Been to Mexico.

(x) Been on a plane.

(x) Been lost.

( ) Been on the opposite side of the country and world(country - not the world)

( ) Gone to Washington, DC

(x) Swam in the ocean.

(x ) Felt like dying.

(x) Cried yourself to sleep.

( ) Played cops and robbers.

( )Recently colored with crayons

(x) Sang Karaoke.

( ) Paid for a meal with only coins....

( ) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't.

( ) Made prank phone calls.

(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose.

(x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue.

(x) Danced in the rain.

(x) Written a letter to Santa Claus?

(x) Been kissed under the mistletoe.

(x) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about.

(x) Blown bubbles.

( ) Made a bonfire on the beach.

(x) Crashed a party.

(x) Gone roller skating

( ) Gone ice skating.

Any nicknames? Shazzy, Sweet checks, babe, Shazza, Shazby, chunky butt
What is your favourite drink? Schmirnoff mixers, wine, cocktails (if I'm not paying), most mixers.

Tattoos? 0

Body Piercings? Ears

How much do you love your job (1-10) 5

Favorite vacation spot?

Been to Africa? No

Ever steal any traffic signs? No

Ever been in a car accident? Yes

Salad dressing? French Dressing - plain but I love it

Favorite pie? Plain meat

Favorite number? 6

Favorite holiday? Vanuatu, Italy, France, Amsterdam

Favorite food? Thai, Seafood, Macadamia & Pecan nuts

Favorite day of the week? Friday Night, Saturday

Favorite brand of body soap?

Favorite TV Show? Greys anatomy, All Saints, Desperate House Wives

Favorite Smell? baking bread, incents, Baking muffins/biscults

Favorite Sound? Rain on a tin roof

What do you do to relax? Play on the computer, have a bath, be with my hubby.

Message to your friends reading this? I love you guys lots and honestly don't know how I would cope with things going on in my life without you. MMMWWWWAAAAAA

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? House wife, with a family of 2 dogs, a cat and hopefully a 9 yr old child.

What do you do when you get bored? I love board, cause I often don't get time for it.

Furthest place you will send this message ? USA

Who will respond the fastesest? MMMMMM

Least likely to respond? Again, MMMMMMMMMMM

Arrgggggggggggg Blogger

Well I don't know what the hell Blogger has done but if you change to the Beta version you now can only post on peoples Blogs who haven't changed over by using annon or other.........yay good one, did ya think of telling us first.

I Started Cycling

Well as of yesterday I officially started cycling!! Last night was my first pill and a very long 6 weeks to go lol. This will be our 4th Fresh cycle or our 8th transfer and if we are lucky enough to conceive and have a beautiful miracle then it will be our last cause I can't do this forever, I think I have aged 20 yrs in 4yrs.

I'm not really sure what else to post being at the begining of your cycle your sort of in no mans land, so the next 3 - 4 weeks will sort of be nothing but dribble. But then you never know lol I may find something exciting to talk about!!

Oh I started watching the old weight thing YES AGAIN!! I want to lose some kg before I go for transfer and so far 1.5kg in 4 days so I'm pretty happy with that.

I have an idea, may work or it may not lol, but if anyone has a question about anything just ask away. Can be about my childhood all those millions of yrs ago or infertility or just anything. (This could be dangerous lol)

Fathers Day

Yesterday was Fathers Day in Australia, so I bought my DH a card and pressie from his little Angel Chloe. It was beautiful to see him have a little cry and I know he misses her.

~~~~~~~HAPPY FATHERS DAY BABY!!~~~~~~~

We went to my parents place for lunch/dinner and both of us were full of cold, so off we went with a box of tissue's and a bottle of wine. Nath had a good day and he even braved grocery shopping at 7 o'clock at night (thankyou baby).

We'll AF arrived Saturday and I start the pill on Wed for a month and then start my injections........I'm on my way woo hooooooooo!!

Oh one more thing ... I'M ON 2 WEEKS HOLIDAYS!!!!!!