It has been a while

I am sorry I haven't been in blog land for a while and yes everything is ok.  I have decided that this Blog won't be password protected, what you see is what you get and after 6 yrs of trying for a Baby and the loss of one 2 yrs ago I want to continue sharing my journey.  If you don't feel up to it I totally understand.

We had another scan last week at 9w 1d and bub is perfect.  Bean measured 2cm, strong heartbeat and good size.  Me on the otherhand has had night sickness which kicks in about 3 everyday, can't eat chocolate of any kind is is devestated lol I mean I still have a fridge full of easter choocolate and I can't deal with it, my pleasure is gone lmao.  I am very tired in the afternoons and could sleep where I am standing which is not a good thing as I work in retail lol but we have decided I will start Maternity leave on the 25th July when I will be 20w.  Honestly it's only starting to kick in that this is real again well besides the constant stretching pains, tiredness and the neusea oh and not to mention the 3x400mg pessaries I have to insert everyday until 12w 2d.

One thing that is playing on my mind is the thought that in 4w 5d my waters broke with my Angel Chloe.  How do you get something like this out of your mind, how do you stop yourself from thinking its going to happen again??  I mean you have never been given a reason why it happened in the first place yet are told it may not happen again......... well what if it does, but what if it doesn't and I pray everyday that it doesn't.