Then and Now

I have to say Maxx was the perfect baby and if I could have children naturally I would of had alot more, but then as my mother said I was the perfect baby and then she had my sister lol. He never cried, loved his food, slept through the night and was overall was just a happy little boy. I sometimes use to look at him and wonder how he could handle anyone touching him at all with all the blood tests he had everyday, or the xrays he had, being flipped from side to side in his humidycrib and when I mean flipped I mean it. They use to put one hand on the baby's head and another one on the feet and just turn them. There was one nurse we hated, we use to call her the hamburgler from McDonalds as she flipped him like a burger I wanted to slap her silly.

He developed his own little personality and loved the attention...well first grandchild on my parents side I guess he got alot of it but so deserved it after all he had been through. Loved daddy singing him to sleep at night and still up until now it still happens.

Being a prem we always were worried about the damage and developmental delays that he would have, I think even more so because he was on HFO (High Frequency Oscillation)

This machine kept him alive first when he was born and then for another 5 weeks when he got sick and caught pneumonia. If a baby is kept on here for too long it can have side effects such as blindness or sight damage, brain bleeds or even brain damage and with him being on it as long as he was and a couple of times needing 100% oxygen we knew there would have to be something that would happen. But no yet again he showed us, no brain bleeds and thank god he's eye sight is perfect.

He put on weight quiet well and normally sat in the 70th percentile but was never a chubba. He loved a good chat and as soon as he could roll there was no stopping him, lost count of how many times I had to rescue him from face plants. As soon as he found his nasal prongs and realised they could come off he would give it ago, even if it mean't ripping the tape off his face that held them in place. Then there was the times when he came off oxygen for periods of time he would scream bloody murder when it was time to tape them back on....anyone would of thought we were breaking bones or something.

Took him a little longer than usual to get into solids but I tend to think this has come from being tube and bottle fed. I got to breast feed him for a few weeks but I wasn't producing enough and he was getting frustrated. He just loved his bottles and still does, but when he eventually started eating solids there was no stopping him he ate anything. I think too I tended to pull back abit with his solids as if I saw him gagging I would stress and think I am not letting him choke to death so would then just give him a bottle and not give him any solids for days. But now he just eats what we do and if we're not quick enough to give it to him he lets you know, its almost like having a dog because if he see's you eating he is there at your feet in a flash. The only thing is he won't feed himself, I know he can do it because I have seen him do it a couple of times but he won't have a bar of it. I've been told it's a boy thing but as long as he still doesn't expect me to be hand feeding him when he's 21 lol.

Before I knew it I was watching him try and sit up and encouraging it. He was so cute to watch push himself up and at the start you could see he was pretty proud of himself. I remember thinking god I can't wait till he crawls then I don't have to carry him everywhere.......well what the hell was I thinking. First of all once he started crawling I actually realised that this little man was growing up and I no longer had a baby, he no longer depended on me 100%, but second of all he was all over the house, in every room, under your feet and anything within his reach was soon on the floor or taken to another room. As from 6 weeks ago he is now standing and walking around furniture. My house is is mess, I have locks on every cupboard and draw, he loves the oven and dish washer, likes throwing his toys in the bath, if it flashes or lights up he wants it and can sniff a remote control out at 40 paces which may come in handy if we ever loose them!

As mentioned earlier he always slept through the night and during the day it was in my arms....big mistake and I can hear you saying it too. When he was in hospital it was encouraged that you held your baby due to the lack of contact prems have when first born and I didn't mind one bit, but I did the same at home and it was because I just didn't want to let him go. I didn't hold him for the first 7 weeks of his early life and not having him at home when he reached term I felt as if I was missing out on his baby life, I would just stare at him. So as the months went on I found myself sitting on the couch for sometimes up to 6 or 7 hrs a day while he slept. I wouldn't eat, and as soon as he was a wake I found myself shooting around the house to do a quick clean. So when it came time for me to start putting him in his bed during the day he would scream bloody murder and it would go on for hours if I left him and even though he was asleep before I put him down he knew what I was doing.....I don't know how but that kid knew. So I started laying down with him in our bed and it seemed to work, at the start he may have only slept for 15-20 mins but it was working so we went with it, he got use to it and started sleeping for longer periods of time. I know what alot of people say about that type of thing but you know what.....we didn't care, if it was working then it was giving me my sanity back, giving me some me time where I could actually eat something or go and have a shower. Maxx's is now having one sleep a day so I have had to get use to rearranging my day again. When he had 2 sleeps I would have my breakfast, shower and do some cleaning before he woke from his first sleep then with his second it was lunch, cleaning and organising dinner but now I am getting use to doing things differntly. In saying that he is getting old enough where he keeps himself occupied while I can get things done.

I still stare at him and can't believe he is mine, he melts me with his smiles, he's laughter and his beautiful nature. He says dad, dadda and daddy and is also starting to pronounce letters but thats it the rest is chatter. I say mum to him and he just laughs, I know he can say the letter m but I think he is tormenting me and I know there are alot of years of that ahead lol.